As Empaths our inner world emotional experiences are vast and deep and when extending this beautiful energy to others we often forget where we end and someone else begins emotionally making it really hard to understand what boundaries even mean for us.
Our need to please others, fit in as well as our inability/resistance to face our fears when saying no to others often far outweighs our need and willingness to either put in place healthy boundaries or even recognize a boundary needs to be there in the first place.
So what are boundaries anyways!? Boundaries are the art of being able to take yourself into consideration in each situation that arises.
A boundary is an expression of our truth and of our feelings and needs.
Boundaries actually allow us to love more deeply and connect more deeply because we’re actually showing ourselves in our vulnerability.
However it takes tremendous inner strength to access that vulnerability just within ourselves especially if you’ve grown up in an environment where boundaries were not acceptable, or you weren’t allowed to express your feelings.
Our first challenge is to learn to access that vulnerability within, to feel safe and connected with ourselves and then not need to seek validation externally and the second is to continue to show up and embrace that vulnerability within, to have patience and determination with the parts of you that are struggling. Below are the six types of boundaries.
Thought or Mental Boundary
This type of boundary relates to our thoughts our beliefs our personal opinions and ideas. In general things that happen within our minds.
Emotional Boundary An emotional boundary is really where you end and someone else begins emotionally.
Understanding what you’re feeling emotionally, choosing what you’re taking on or not taking on emotionally.
Being really clear in how much responsibility do we take on for others feelings
Time Boundary A time boundary is more subtle and can definitely include the other 5 but essentially it relates to how you’re spending our time. Physical Boundary A physical boundary relates to our physical personal space, where we spend a lot of our time like a home or office. Material Boundary
A material boundary relates to things like our belongings, clothes, home..etc as well as finances.
Sexual Boundary Our sexual boundaries are what we feel safe and comfortable with in terms of our sexual expression, our sexual connection and intimacy with one another person.
As you read over each boundary what jumps out at you? Which boundary is most difficult for you right now? Are you giving too much of your time to others and not enough for yourself? Is someone invading your physical space? Are you constantly thinking about a situation where someone wronged you and you didn't stand up for yourself?
Even if you do have a really kind and loving internal dialogue if we're going through life putting others needs before our own, we’re not showing up for ourselves in action which can create feelings and beliefs of unworthiness.
We need to take ourselves into equal consideration as we do others, not higher or lower = equal otherwise we’re massively diminishing our own self worth every time we don’t set a boundary.
This means being able to show up honestly in your relationships. Really considering ourselves and ultimately empathizing in healthy ways. I'm not going to lie boundaries can be really tricky, especially for empaths. Please reach out if you'd like some support navigating this. Check out my Boundaries Workbook, and learn to apply the 6 boundaries into the 7 different areas of your life with ease. Join the FREE Empath Mini Course Let's connect on a FREE discovery Call
Join us in the Intuitive Empath Hub as we explore the 4 different mistakes Empaths make when setting a boundary.
In loving service, Lalita | Spiritual Growth Coach
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